What happens when you kill Miriel the Pope Turtle in Elden Ring?

If you are one of the 12 million buyers elden ring In the past few weeks, you’ve probably met Miriel, aka Pastor of Vows, aka Pope Turtle, aka an instant inductee into the Video Game Characters Hall of Fame. Chances are you’ll befriend this rare, kind soul in the Lands Between. but elden ring is a game by FromSoftware, so you may have also wondered a thought so insidious it must never be said: what would happen if I killed the turtle pope?

Reader, learn from the mistakes of others. Don’t kill the turtle pope.

After all, that’s what we have the internet for. This allows others to make mistakes and thoroughly document them for our morbid curiosity. YouTubers like Indyrael captured footage of Miriel being sliced ​​and diced into turtle soup. Be warned, this video is not what I would call one funny time.

Somehow the written report hardened my heart even more than this video and turned the organ into dust. On Reddit, user VG_Crimson posted a horrifying moment-to-moment retelling of the turtle murder titled “I killed Pope Turtle, so you don’t have to.”

Miriel has tremendous health and doesn’t seem to be concerned about the initial hits. They try to retreat into their shell but that is not possible, presumably because of their oversized papal cap. Despite Miriel’s strength, confidence, and kindness, the health bar can and will eventually drop to zero. Then comes the real punishment.

Miriel doesn’t curse you, nerf your stats, or even deal damage. Miriel is crying. “It’s a sad cry,” writes VG_Crimson, “much higher than one would expect from one of its size. You get a pair of turtlenecks and his bell store to buy whatever is available in his store, but he’ll never ask you to study together again.”

FromSoftware games like Dark Souls have long offered surprising rewards or terrifying punishments for players who push their limits. But with Miriel, the game’s creators seem to understand that the biggest twist in slaying Pope Turtle is that the game doesn’t change in any way other than missing his adorable smile.

The Lands Between have so few friends, protect the ones you have!