Stephen Colbert Turns Down Trumpy Florida Judge For Murder Mask Committee

Stephen Colbert opened Late evening monologue by saying that he “always hopes to live to see the end of COVID safety precautions.” He just doesn’t think it would be “unusual” for a federal judge to scrap the CDC’s mask-wearing rule for planes and public transportation.

“Unsurprisingly, the verdict comes from a federal judge based in Tampa,” commented the host. “You can’t let Florida make the health decisions for the entire country! That’s not smart. The food pyramid in Florida is just a fool and meth! “

Colbert went on to question Judge Kathryn Kimball Mizelle’s reasoning that the CDC’s powers were limited to “things like cleaning up property” and “putting on a mask to do nothing.” “At most, it traps virus droplets,” she added.

“That’s the mask’s job, you idiot! So my drops do not stick to you! ‘ he shot back. “That’s like saying, ‘This diaper is useless, every time I put one on my baby, it’s full of poop.”

Then note that the “genius lawyer” was appointed by Donald Trump after he lost the 2020 election, Colbert revealed that she received an “unqualified” review from the American Bar Association and had never even tried a case before.

And for those airline passengers who discovered that the mission had been lifted by a pilot who congratulated them mid-flight, Colbert said: “Congratulations is a quirky way to announce the unloading. remove safety measures”.

Ultimately, he concluded: “People can get this news however they want, but it’s not fair that people who may be immunocompromised or flying with young children are discouraged from changing the rules. mid-flight congestion. It was like being told in the middle of a dinner party that it was a nightmare. “

For more, listen to and subscribe to The Last Laugh podcast.