Mass Effect 3: Kaidan Romance Guide

Kaidan Alenko returns to Mass Effect 3 as a squad member and potential romantic partner for those playing as any gender, as long as he survived the events of the first game. He doesn’t need to have been romanced previously in the Mass Effect: Legendary Edition collection. Although continuing a relationship will change their interactions with each other early in the third game.

It’s also possible for Kaidan to die during a key story moment, so it’s important to make a lot of correct decisions in order to keep him alive and continue a relationship with him to the end of Mass Effect: Legendary Edition.


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How to Romance Kaidan in Mass Effect 3​​​​​

Female Shepard talking with Kaidan on Mars in Mass Effect 3

Kaidan appears right at the beginning of the game, but these dialogue options have no repercussions. Feel free to choose any response. During the first conversation the pair have on Mars about Shepard’s ties with Cerberus in Mass Effect 3, respond with “You know me better than that”. During the next conversation regarding Cerberus, pick “How can you say that?” and “I never left”.

Buy the TM88 – Peruvian Whiskey from Sirta Supplies at the Huerta Memorial Hospital and give it to a recovering Kaidan to get some bonus dialogue with him when they next speak. This will occur when Kaidan sends a message to Shepard’s private terminal after another mission has been completed.

During the conversation with Kaidan after he wakes up, make sure to pick “Yeah” if he asks if they are good, and apologize and choose him over another character romanced in the second game. After the conversation, leave to complete one more mission in order to get another message from Kaidan. Return to the Citadel and speak with him again.

How to Save Kaidan in Mass Effect 3

Kaidan Mass Effect Legendary Edition

Cerberus and Udina will attempt a coup as part of “The Citadel II” mission after “Tuchanka” has been completed. As Kaidan is now a Spectre, he is trying to protect Udina and the Council. He must trust Shepard enough to convince him they are not working with Cerberus. This somewhat convoluted point system for how to save the Virmire survivor in Mass Effect 3 can be a little confusing.

Thankfully, players carrying over a romance with Kaidan from Mass Effect 1 will receive a handy point boost. Even without this boost, Kaidan is guaranteed to survive if:

  • Shepard was nice to him on Mars.
  • Players visit him both times at the hospital (and apologize for cheating in Mass Effect 2).
  • The Paragon prompt is selected while trying to convince Kaidan to trust Shepard.
  • Players use intimidate or charm options to convince Kaidan to trust them.

With these choices, even if players receive negative points for past decisions not related to Kaidan for this skill check, he will survive if players have enough reputation in Mass Effect 3 to charm or intimidate him into trusting Shepard. After this major event, Kaidan will be waiting outside the Normandy. Pick “Absolutely” to continue romancing him.

How to Get Romance Scene With Kaidan

Male Shepard starting romance with Kaidan on Citadel Presidium

Kaidan can now be talked to on the Normandy, but nothing will start or continue a romance with him yet. Wait for an email from him and then head to the Presidium area of the Citadel. Pick “I want to be together” or “I think I want that too” to lock in a relationship with Kaidan.

The dialogue will be slightly different depending on their prior relationship status. It’s recommended to leave the Citadel DLC in Mass Effect 3 until after the pair’s relationship is locked in to experience some additional romantic scenes between Shepard and Kaidan during the fan-favorite mission.

Female Shepard and Kaidan in bed during Mass Effect 3

As long as players have locked in a relationship with him, Kaidan will come to Shepard’s quarters when the mission to assault Cronos Station is started. Select “I’m glad you’re here” (and “I love you” if it appears) to spend the night with him. Make sure to talk to Kaidan before the final push on Earth for one last extended talk between the pair. If he is a squadmate during the final assault and survives as part of the best ending in Mass Effect 3, Kaidan is forced back to the Normandy. Shepard can tell him they love him one last time before parting ways.

Mass Effect: Legendary Edition is out now for PC, PS4, and Xbox One.

MORE: Mass Effect Legendary Edition Complete Guide – Tips, Tricks, Discussions, & News

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About The Author Mass Effect 3: Kaidan Romance Guide


ClareFora is a Interreviewed U.S. News Reporter based in London. His focus is on U.S. politics and the environment. He has covered climate change extensively, as well as healthcare and crime. ClareFora joined Interreviewed in 2023 from the Daily Express and previously worked for Chemist and Druggist and the Jewish Chronicle. He is a graduate of Cambridge University. Languages: English. You can get in touch with me by emailing:

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